Swings and roundabouts

Its been ages since I posted last. Lots has happened. The prep for our remodel and trip to the UK, and L going to school really took its toll.

The worst was the first day of K. On the way home, my son casually told me (as only a 5yo can), that he had a Turkey and cheese sandwich at school today. But I didn't pack him a sandwich!!!!

Turns out the head teacher (to whom I had spoken at great and copious lengths), FORGOT to tell L's teacher that he was *only to eat food from home*; his teacher knew about his allergy, but not the no food rule. Thank goodness he was fine. But I was not - I fell to pieces. After all the effort trying to prepare for his new school; something as fundamental as this went wrong. It totally blew away all confidence and faith that I had it 'under control'.

I also couldn't believe he stood in line with the other kids! He must have asked the cafeteria staff if there were any peanuts or tree nuts.. because he asked me if he was allergic to wheat (which was probably what the cafeteria staff asked him!).

What could I have done differently? What did I do wrong? What should I have done that I didn't do? What if he had had a reaction? Lots of guilt, worry, fear, anger - on top of my travails of the last few months it was all too much. It totally blew my energy stores, and I was left bereft!

What did I do? First thing was to speak to his teacher first thing next morning. She was horrified and very sympathetic. Then what? Need to regroup and work out what additional profilactic actions I can take?

I read Linda Coss' How to manage Your Child's life Threatening Food Allergies and also Caring for your Child with Severe Food Allergies. Both gave me a really good idea of what I could have additionally done.

I also scanned KidsWithFoodAllergies web site (one of my favourite online support forums for Parents). Along with reading great posts from those that have been-there before me, I found an excellent 'Food Allergy Discussion Guide' bySafe@School, in the Resources section.

Anyways, I cobbled together a discussion list for the head teacher, and also put together a folder for the Class teacher (and any substitute teachers). The folder includes:
o Emergency Action Plan
o A summary of L's allergy and asthma, and dermatographia (1 page)
o A list of possible symptoms, along with 4 pictures of L having a reaction (2 pages)
o An introduction to Food Allergies (2 pages)
o The Chart which shows the grading of symptom severity

I met with the head teacher and his class teacher. We discussed the contents of the folder, how we would deal with L's penchant for lining up with the other kids, the symptoms and signs of an allergic reaction. We also talked about using FAAN's PAL program. The school were very positive! And I feel a little more positive now. Although my illusion of control is not in evidence (probably a good thing!).

I still need to work with L on a new set of skills of how respond in this new environment...